Or The Schuyler Sisters.

Starred for embiggens.

He was from the future.

True story: I was in the US and showed my Cndn driver license to make a purchase with my Cndn credit card. Clerk: “so, Canada, that’s an American state, right?” Well, ok if you’re a bit fuzzy on foreign geography, but you should know your own freakin’ states.

As someone who is getting over a throat infection and has probably taken liver-damaging amounts of ibuprofen and tylenol in the last 3 days so that I can feel like I’m not being stabbed in the throat when I swallow, good choice RiRi. Get better, girl.

It worked so well those other two times you tried that, didn’t it? (Those wars were much more complicated than that but I still find it entertaining)

I don’t see any problem with this. Once we conquer Canada and make them our affable slaves such landscape will be an American territory. It represents progress, goals, an America double the size and GOING STRONG. God, freedom tastes sweet, doesn’t it? Like sweet, sweet maple syrup-all you can drink. We’re coming for…

Holy shit I recognize 5 of these names. Time to die.

Old speaking, but I really wish artists would class it up a little bit on the red carpet. I know it’s the Grammys, not the Oscars, and it’s always been a little bit crazier than the other award shows, but I wish people would try to look their best. If you want to go crazy, that’s what the VMAs and AMAs are for. Bring…

She grew less and less interested in her enrichment activities (even back then they knew octopi needed things to do), finally just languishing on the bottom of her tank. Gradually she moved to the side, in one corner. She planned this... the staff said they couldn’t account for it any other way. She lulled them into…

Good thing they only live 4 years. Not enough time to enslave mankind.

How. In God's name. Does an octopus. Commit suicide.

Oh good. I guess that must be standard now. Way to go, aquariums!

Apparently they had to put a cover on the tank because one of them would just crawl out on the regular and go over to another open exhibit to chow down on mussels and starfish!

Now I feel less guilty for being lazy and not taking my kids to the Seattle Acquarium today like we had planned.

It kind of freaks me out how smart they are. And who knows what other schemes they are plotting down there...

Last time I was at art class, we spent about ten minutes talking about how octopodes are awesome but also terrifying but also awesome. About 50% of the class seemed convinced that one day an octopus was coming for them.

Poor Kong. And poor ladies. The Seattle Aquarium Octopi are quite determined to get it on, too. A few years ago they had two in a tank separated by a mesh so they could see each other but not hook up. Those crafty octis unscrewed the bolts holding the mesh in place, for their love was true.

First the lobsters now this? Sea creatures have some kinky sex lives.

Love the ocean for keeping it real. And love octopi for being smart motherfuckers who show zoologist that THEY ARE NOT HERE TO ENTErTAIn HUMANS!