I dated a chick named Mary once. Are you her? If so, I remember you being a lot less childish. I'm sorry that this has happened to you. Also a guy named Harold, really? You can do better Mary.

Not terribly so. "Drang nach Osten" is actually preeeetty fucking close to "manifest destiny."

Sehr richtig. Jezt, können Sie mir mit eines bestimmtes Frage helfen….?

Horrifying. I mean the men all deserved this shit out of what happened to them, and quite frankly I'd be alright with "sic semper rapists", but there's just this terrible exsitential dread that it evokes somewhere above my thighs and below by belly button.

He's deadly serious. He's just a fuckwad. This line: " If a single woman is able to do one of those jobs then that is all
that is required to demonstrate that being female does not hinder one in
accomplishing that goal" is the Freudian slip (is there such a thing as intentionally Freudian slipping?) that let's any…

Ha, hehehehe, "viscous insults". Hear that @LurkyMcLurkerson:disqus? Your insults were too thick for this guy. He prefers a cleaner, smooth flowing insult.

No, no, no, no, no. Shut up. Go to jail.

I was never mean to the children. The children were, for the vast majority, too earnest and innocent to be mean to. I was occasionally snarky to their fat pigs of parents though. And I was very often snarky with the terrible old people (and I was in Florida so there were tons) who would come in and demand their senior…

To this day I still get adverts for girls' products on account of my nickname. Damn you American Girl dolls for stealing my, and Christopher Marlowe's, sobriquet. A lot of people have just assumed I would be a girl prior to meeting me.

Are you sure they weren't Canadian?

Well, yeah, sure. As long as you have a portable electron microscope. Not really sure why you'd want to see that though. It's like going up to a woman on the first date and asking to see her syanpses. Definitely second date material.

I've refereed many youth hockey games, and those parents are just absolutely brutal. I really respect what those NHL refs do, except that they're all a bunch of fucking brain-dead sacks of shit who couldn't tell their monkey-fucking dicks from their pineapple-gobbling assholes. Seriously, you make that call on Saad…

As a new Nerth Curlinian I really should root for the Panthers. Problem is, I've always been really big into schadenfreude. Especially in football. As a Bears fan born in '88 I relish other people's teams failing so they can know my pain.

Upper Midwest for sure. Us Chicagoans are quite a bit more vocally angry and self-delusional. Just look at what happened to Chris Conte the newsreporter: http://msn.foxsports.com/bu…

Thanks for reminding me, I need to get a new jock. My current one is too small (ladies) and I feel self conscious whenever I need to adjust it on the ice.

I'm ecstatic that the Big Hurt got in. I always wanted to be him as a child. Cruelly, God cursed me to be born a middle-class white boy. Oh cruel fate.

No luck catchin' them killers then?

There's a vas deferens between quality pun threads and this tripe.

That's terrifying. Your wife is terrifying. She's not allowed in my house.

In fact for the majority of the Tokugawa shogunate, Christianity was almost expressly forbidden. It had one enclave in the entire nation and that was at the Dutch section of Nagasaki. The Tokugawa had, rightfully, assumed that missionaries spreading Christianity was a precursor to an attempted foreign takeover of…