Somewhere in a heaven not ours, Nelson Van Alden is gyrating to some barroom live version of White Light/ White Heat. With whiskey, and his eyes all on fire…

This is the first I've done this season, actually. I've done Nelson's Journal seasons 2-4, but this season there's been an impostor. His or her work was fairly good, and I'm sure, down thread, they are awaiting your thanks.

"A sort of darkness seems to abound. It is not mine, nor is it Mr. Thompson's… but it lingers like morning fog, and is related to something in New Jersey. I am a bandit and a thief. I am, in a multitude of ways, Barabbas. I am freed from judgement and loosed upon the gasping quaint souls who thought, perhaps, I'd been…

If this is anybody but Steve Allen, you're stealing my bit

Well that was clearly deserved…

Beautifully shot, plenty of violence, mostly lots of tits, snappy dialog…. yessir this is the show!

Yasssss the ear was necessary… we're all here because of things like the ear.

Don't fucking apologize to that guy!

*sighs* …goddamnit

So it was a joke? Why would you apologize for a joke?

No. You're gone. Shut up and stay that way.

Such lovely punctuation… I don't think you've quoted Sonia

The comment was far less egregious than the awful editing of last week's review, in my humble opinion.

Eh……

"Who controls the British crown? Who keeps the metric system down? We do, we do. Who keep martians under raps? Who keeps Atlantis off the maps? We do, we do!"

"These white slippers are albino African endangered Rhino"

"I watch a lot of shows that deal with concepts I didn't grow up, ideas I don't understand."

It's the VanDerWerf school of writing.

Also, I gotta say, kid606 is the stupidest shit I've ever heard in my life

Jocks can't dig music? I mean, I don't care for Sublime, either, but playing and enjoying sports does not mean that one cannot also play and enjoy good music.