*reads article, farts*

Script -

Yeah because Detroit is the whitest city going…

"……… I think he's talking to you."

What they don't understand is that I am the voice of the generation in question.

As a somewhat portly man with dark hair, one who enjoys his drink, I feel King Robert represents me perfectly.

You don't have to take the bible seriously to believe in God.

Five seasons? That's enough.

Bah! Too long!

Breaking Bad, because it takes two seconds and I don't have to suffer through it each and every goddamn time.

Yeah but space is stupid.

Yes it is. All films based on works of maritime fiction are stupendous. Didn't you see Starz production of Moby Dick?

Winner for best Gary Larson reference.

Russell Crowd? Is that a euphemism for being hit in the face with a cell phone?

Oh man, the scene in My Favorite Year when Peter O'Toole is being brought up the stairs on a dolly….

But Wikipedia says he's Catholic…

"One of the best musicals ever"

Crowe: "Oi, what's my character's motivation here?"

Or you could be mauled by her eyebrows.

Somebody could have used all this money to make a Master and Commander sequel…