Looking back, it is pretty amazing that the entirety of The Spiderwick Chronicles was condensed into a single film. I miss those days. (Spiderwick was a damn good kids' movie, by the way. Well, I thought it was damn good when I saw it at age thirteen, when my standards were much lower than they are today, but still.)

Meh. There's already too much excellent television out there for me to spend time hoping that I might like a show everybody else says is mediocre.

HJ's real name: Craig J. Clark

Especially on mobile. Takes fucking forever to type tags on an iPhone keyboard. Especially since it always autocorrects "i" to "I".

Ease up on the snark, guys. Right now, Spy's Tomatometer rating is 96%.

So, kind of a Lord Of The Flies-meets-Under The Dome type thing.

Oh, I thought this was going to be a review for that one Stephen Chow movie with the dude with the giant foot.

Seriously. Give me a Jango Fett spinoff instead; at least he went out in style.

Leave it to Lupita Nyong'o to make a white-dot-covered face look gorgeous.

First Edgar Wright, then MacLaren, and now this. Why is it that the directors I get most excited about for joining awesome movies are the always ones that quit?

Yeah, I'm really surprised people think The Dark Knight supports mass illegal surveillance. It's definitely portrayed as problematic at best. And Lucius and Batman destroyed the surveillance system at the end!

Yeeesss love the username and profile pic

The latest Terminator Genisys trailer literally does that "build to silence" thing four times.

I had kind of just assumed that every American's family owned slaves at some point.

Jeez, I keep forgetting Tasha still contributes here now and again. Hi Tasha!

Alex—you don't have to waste time reading all seven Harry Potter books if you don't want to (though they are pretty good). Just watch the movies. You can get it done in a day.

That's the one. (spoilers for the season 2 finale) And then he just blew up.

Every time I see an advertisement for this movie, I always laugh when Harrison Ford gives his contract-obligated endorsement. "It's a delight to work on a movie that's got that kind of magic that excites your imagination and opens your heart."

Wait, this movie isn't based on a book?

I'm probably the only person anywhere who actually kind of wanted to see a sequel to Jack the Giant Slayer. I would totally pay money to see Ewan McGregor be a crossbow-wielding badass in shiny black armor a second time, even if no giants were involved.