OH WOW THATS SOME FUCKED UP SHIT

When I was young you could also purchase his death certificate. They sold it at Spencer's Gifts. I'm sure that I stole a copy of it at some point.

I can wear this with My Abraham Lincoln Autopsy report mesh-back trucker cap.

Yeah, that is horrible.

i absolutely approve my last words or suicide note for a tshirt, but just know i am going to be a total cunt about both so you look like a complete tool in your shirt.

wait. you can cut a dick with a scissor?

Cut my penis of once, shame on you. Cut my penis off twice...QUIT CUTTING MY PENIS OFF!!!

In the sense that I appreciate a lot more about myself, it did! It was really interesting to see how I narrated my own life and which questions created detailed answers. I think the staring at my eyes in the mirror for 4 minutes was the hardest part because I kept wanting to brush my teeth or play with my hair.

Um, isn't Tyler Perry going to write this sequel? "Girl, I thought you were gone."

um

Maybe just shopped in a potted plant. You know, something less offensive than a human woman

they should have just MS paint scribbled over her and then put an arrow and wrote NOT A GIRL

"Mein gott, zeese American actresses are like underfed zoo animals. I feel as zo I finally know true terror."

LET GO OF IT. LET FUCKING GO OF IT OR I'LL EAT YOUR GODDAMN FINGERS LIKE FRENCH FRIES.

Christoph Waltz: Amy, dear, do you remember your childhood friend from Colorado, the cow you raised for 4-H, lovingly feeding her from a bottle, watching her as she grazed on the family farm? Well, Daisy's here to congratulate you on your win.

Beef?

Holy shit.

I'm gonna start a tampon smuggling ring. Who's with me?

Items for "women's sanitary health" are always such an incredibly low priority but women can not function without them. This shit doesn't surprise me and I'm glad companies are going to try and help, but it's that it got to this point that bothers me. If it was an item men needed for a week every month, you can bet it…