I wasn’t allowed to keep mine because it’s considered, you know, medical waste. My fiance snapped a picture of it for me. In the picture, my midwife is holding it from the top and it looks like someone’s gnarly picture of some prized, deep sea catch. Basically, it’s fucking horrifying.

I cannot take it anymore. Why are Republicans so. fucking. stupid?

The most tragic thing about Jeffrey Dahmer was that he was not born a crow.

I have two children, ages two and four. My husband and I both work full time jobs. Our children and family are benefiting from reduced cost health care for our children. The financial strain of adding our children to one of our employer provided health care plans will be unreal. We just bought a house, I am afraid for…

The title President of the United States is going to be such an embarrassing title for a politician to inherit after this living, breathing dumpster fire’s term ends. POTUS needs rebranding STAT. Like CEO of Gilead or something. I don’t know. Something!

Oh, gosh, I love her. She is joy personified.

That’s so sad. What’s wrong with that poor animal?

One of the most satisfying feelings in the world is relieving a milk engorged breast. For real. The relief is incredible.

After having two babies, I am the reigning Queef Queen. I am a benevolent ruler.

I work in a hospital emergency room there’s this middle aged man working security who keeps telling anyone who will listen about his plan to organize ride to a mosque downstate with a bunch of motorcycle enthusiasts. I guess their plan is to stand outside of the mosque with their guns with the intent to terrify other…