When I was a kid I once got a piece of grass stuck between my thumb nail and the bed of the nail. The piece of grass that was sticking out of my thumb broke off when I pulled it so it was stuck there until my grandparents took me to the doctor and he removed my nail and pulled the pus covered grass out.

Oh my god so many

My first and in retrospect funny Valentine’s Day story happened in 6th grade. I bought my new “boyfriend” some chocolates at the local dollar store and took them to school, excited to give them to him. Well just as I was about to hand them over he broke up with me. I was upset but more mad I spent my money on…

I flew home to visit my sister at the end of February. She had just had a baby and I was meant to help her for a few days. Before I left my husband and I talked about if it was smart to go. I figured it was fine since cases has only been reported on the West Coast and we were in New York. I bought some alcohol wipes…

My dad was/is a drunk abussive asshole and he use to love to watch Rick Steve’s Europe and he once told me to pay attention because I would probably never see any of the world unless I married rich.