If I could talk it down? Nice. If I lived in Florida? Nice. If it was really legit? Nice.

It's like somebody tossed out a 1980s-era drug dealer's garage.

@Novaload: Hopefully this means we'll get a reissued old-shape DS.

Corolla Axio? Wouldn't Azumanga Daioh be more appropriate?

@TheCroatianGuy: Surprise Christianity is like surprise buttsekhs but less funny.

Somebody start the "Save the Sables!" campaign!

Hmm...as much as the Lancia and Scirocco wow'd me, I'd take the Dodge van with the suggestive black hole inside of the gold stripe. Then drive around and pick up chicks.

@ghengis65: I question that interpretation as it probably requires quite a bit of brain power to come up with that - probably more than this guy every had.

@Ash78, GBTW: Heisenberg probably never got a speeding ticket in his life.

Didn't read the post all the way through. In that case, I'd change to any Mercedes-Benz produced in the 1980s or earlier. Bulletproof and cheap. Plus if it's diesel, you can dick-wave to the eco-greenies with a veg. sticker.

Honda Fit. It's cheap and big enough for normal people.

Yes, but only in RWD or 4WD form. Anything less and it's a no.

@Psiu! Puxa!: You're right, Mopar or no car!:

Damn it, why did I choose to be a tree-hugging, bike-riding, college student when I could have trained to be the next Alonso - without the bitchy entitled attitude, that is.

@yuzan: (looks at Yaris)

Is this a brand-new truck? It doesn't look like like it's had many miles on it.

@RäcinG73™: How did they get today's Jalopnik three months ago?

You didn't say it had to have an engine.

@FormerlyPreferredCustomer: Download or youtube. Believe me, it's worth it - I came for the Quattro and stayed for the show. The quattro does get a window shot out, though.

中华人民共和国万岁！