I love the username. It makes me picture an 8-year old Jeff Van Gundy, already bald and looking overly sullen, sitting at the family kitchen table with an empty plate in front of him and holding a knife in one hand and a fork in the other while an obese 10-year old Stan Van Gundy shovels food into his gaping maw. If…

Wait, dammit, my edit went through after all.

You gotta admit, the change from carrying the helmets to wearing them is probably a net positive.

Haven’t you ever heard about how snitches get stitches? Guess what’s going to happen to these movies now. Thanks io9. Did you make sure we have homework this weekend too?

WHY ARE YOU BLOWING UP SPOTS? WHY ARE YOU CONTACTING PORNHUB!? #STOPSNITCHING 

I know, right? Nobody likes a snitch.

We’ve reached out to Pornhub and will update if we hear back.

I was curious about this — if UK fouled before the pass, it was free throws and ball? I think that’s what it should have been, but was just looking at all scenarios.

I’m partial to the San Diego Bad Hombres. Some, I assume, are good players.

That’s a funny fucking headline.

I guess Elway thought they needed to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth.

If at first you don’t secede, try, try again.

In my day, some fucking asshole poseur kids nailed APPLE baskets to trees, thinking they could be just like James Naismith.

I see the Browns dealing Brock to the Cavs to fill the Bogut spot. Brock is Very Tall.

BOOMSHAKALAKA!!!

he keeps this up, he’s getting sent to thousand island

Reuben, what happened at the combined?!

Quick question, though: Is there anything left in this world that doesn’t cause cancer?

I suppose I’ll just have to clog my arteries to such a degree that the cancer can’t get through