important follow up question: is current Justin Theroux hotter than current Brad Pitt

“It had TWO muppet-like characters”

Read that as ‘Make your husband and the kids watch,” and thought you went to a fairly dark place.

If my husband does the manny, I will be

How do you get Dairy Queened from a tournament?

You are pretty naive if you think Pierce Bronson didn’t hit that.

What are they supposed to put on their Christmas cards? Their cats?

Kids are terrible. That’s awful advice.

1. Hire a male nanny (and hope your husband isn’t gay).
   

TL;DR Wimmen. Can’t live with ‘em. Can’t kill ‘em. Unless you defund healthcare for them because BABIES. Amen.

Time to check Chris Christie’s office emails.

‘brosnan, whose wife got fat and weirdly he’s still with her’ is all anyone ever wants to write.

I’m surprised the article about Pierce Brosnan didn’t have a picture of his wife. The DM among others is fucking obsessed with showing pictures of his wife! I can’t even bring myself to put into words why they do what they do.

Woody Allen is one of the greatest filmmakers America has ever produced, and we are going to be talking about people are going to be talking about Woody’s films for a long, long time.

Blake Lively speaking hyper-intellectualized Woody Allen dialogue is the funniest thing i can imagine, I’m very excited.

I just. . . I just have a hard time believing that Jay-Z actually cares that much about Taylor Swift, and by extension, whether or not Kanye West and she are friends.

Piggy, listen to me. You can do so much better than that green lump of boring. You are an elegant, tasteful woman of means. You need an underwear model, and Taylor Swift needs a new album’s worth of material. Are you picking up what I’m putting down?

Fuck ‘em is right. Early on when this debate was firing up, I heard a wonderfully simple and devastating rebuttal from a historian, when confronted with the stock defense of “Well the flag is about heritage and courage in the face of the South losing the war.”

FINISH HIM

Well, you do have to forgive him for wanting to watch all that Baseball and Basketball. I mean, the Knicks, the Mets...he just likes hanging out with other folk that haven’t done anything worthwhile since 1973.