Why is this news? Pussy Riot has been fighting the glass ceiling for a long time now.

McGrady's fastball sits at about 85 mph

in the most depressing, Russian way ever.

"Oh, so this guy hits a game-winner, and no one says a thing."

I ain't never seen no talking winning nothing.

Really, Alex? We've all heard this joke before. You really should have expected the Spanish big collision.

The Blair Walsh Project

strap a camera to Muhammad Ali

Whoa. Is that guy even moving? Those Chargers fans really overdid it. Talk about beating a dead horse.

give him J.R. Smith's roster spot.

Francis wrinkled old state filling.

Sheesh. China always makes everything sound negative. Meanwhile, more reputable news outlets reported, "Elderly Floridians say that Pope is satisfying their spiritual hunger."

All these IDs and still I'm with these egos.

Seems like irresponsible journalism to be putting WOOD on the fire story.

DISCOUNT DOUBLE CHECK!

You see each team's projected draft position; I see Milwaukee's projected win totals.

15.5 Getting shit by a car.

Any chance your next column will talk about how to clean up when one makes a mess of one's reputation?

Well, don't I suck at reading bylines. Slander retracted (but left for posterity just in case new shit comes to light).

I personally love a pecan. Never met one I didn't like!