I have been in scrubs for years. Now, I have a new job where I have to be very business. Exact instructions: “Not suits, but more than business casual. We want clients to look at you and know you are the professional.” I have never been fashionable and this whole building a wardrobe is daunting. I went in a high end…

Is Kennywood Kenny G’s amusement park?

I love love love mayonnaise, but the thought of this made me heave.

Thanks for the nightmares!

My parents have done this. They thought decorative soaps my grandma sent from Belgium were chocolates. They thought they tasted weird and gave them to our neighbor. The neighbors enjoyed them. My parents never asked if they are them or bathed with them. 

“I wanna hold you

Exactly.

I hate to win pissing contest two weeks in a row, but if “I want to fuck you where you fart” isn’t a winner, then I don’t know what is. 

Wow. Just....wow. 

As a registered dietitian that works in skilled nursing/long term care, this resident would have been receiving tube feeding. (A person in a vegetative state is not safe for eating by mouth.) She was likely receiving more calories and protein than she truly needed, which made it easy for her body to have the minimal…

“No sex in oh six.” It ended up being my most slutty year yet. I couldn’t live up to the pressure. 

So yeah, I did that and now I can’t get into my old Kinja. Warning to others: if you don’t have your Kinja Key, don’t do this.... :-(