If the FDA would like to recommend a better way to eat my feelings I’d love to hear it.

hey FDA- FUCK YOU. i’ve eaten about 1,00,000 pounds of raw cookie dough and i’m still standing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i want to be friends with “crazy liberal Ed”.

You seem very riled up about strangers.

Rhode Island has plenty of destitute poverty just like every other state. Blackstone Valley Prep has 67% of students eligible for free lunch. And these were Teach for America teachers, who are only placed in high-needs schools (and in theory are supposed to be super committed to the idea that their students aren’t…

Just stop. School is where you’re supposed to be allowed to try and fail at things without worrying that the people paid to help and encourage you are mocking you and hoping you fail.

You’re right, any high school student who doesn’t put 100% effort into every assignment is a fucking idiot who should be pilloried by her teachers. You seem like an incredibly understanding and reasonable individual.

i sure hope you spell everything fucking perfectly.

i’m going to re-post my reply to everyone who think these teachers’ comments are ok:

Jesus Christ. They tried to lynch her. Look at that wound. That will leave a scar that people will ask her about her whole life. Not only will she have to live with the memory of her classmates trying to LYNCH her, but she will also be reminded of it every time she looks in the mirror.

Meh. The only “reunion” I care about is NY Housewives. It’s going to be epic!

When will we finally be done with the “New York Jew” caricature, movies/television/social media/digital and print journalism? When?

If she didn’t figure it out when he says he’ll be home at six, shows up at 7:15 and the first thing he does is take a shower? I mean, I realize denial is a very strong emotion especially when it’s someone you love, but...

I like Jules well enough, but:

Maniacal giggle is right. I mean, I guess she’s happy and good for her but Jesus, I find it disconcerting every time she talks about Tom (I think that’s his name). She sounds like she’s high every time and not on love, but drugs.

Luann is the bomb! The way she out Bethennied Bethenny was insane!

Luann seems genuinely elated and in love with the guy. I have to believe that it’s for real because I don’t think she’s a good enough actress to pull off that kind of performance. Maybe housewife years are like dog years and 6 weeks to them is like 6 months or 6 years to us normals.

A lady *and* Jewish! Who reads! What is the world coming to?

a New York Jew with a copy of the Times tucked into her bag.

I love that Vogue considers Schumer’s totally unsurprising fondness for the New York Times to be a literary eccentricity requiring ethnographic contextualization: