The tear stained mattress was comforting.

I saw one that said motor boating instead. That’s one I can get down too.

But, is he woke? If so, does that make him a woke bae(hive)?

Were there no women available in a kitchen? The only backup then is to light a fire in your cave and take care of your meat.

You should never have sugary bbq sauce on ribs. You sick bastard.

Paris Hilton for Vice President!

You have the right hair line to own a Miata.

It’s about heritage, not hate. Right? I’m sure they don’t like the Jews very much either so it’s probably a cultural thing.

It’s a paradox. One car will get you laid but isn’t easy to have sex in. The other is easy to have sex in, but can’t get you laid. Choose wisely.

Daaaaamn Daniel!

It appears that the wheel and fire were invented simultaneously.

There are worse things to go see.

Well I would be down with the trams over taxis then too. So, Tram > Uber > Taxi.

I would have a robot wife then and wouldn’t care...

If I lived there, this would make me exclusively use Uber.

This describes 99% of all comments on the internet.

I’m not drunk, my car is.

The fact you picked her up at the bar being the first regrettable decision?

Uhhh, nope, nothing at all.