Maybe you shouldn't be here...

He’s already demanded a trade to the Pirates.

Major League teams: “we don’t condone this sort of thing.”

“Come on in! The water is grrrreat!

I know y’all get to decide on your own bear coverage, but the most important summer bear news is that Pedals survived the winter and is roaming New Jersey once again. Pedals is the hero we desperately need right now. Look at him! He walks like people, but he’s a bear!

Thank god that “THAT GUY” didn’t take Friday off.

Look, it happens. You have a fair bit of success and it makes you get a big head.

IMO Emrick is quite possibly the best commentator in North American sports for how quickly yet clearly he can talk and get information out, his level of excitement, his obvious love of hockey, and for knowing when to keep quiet and letting the fans make the soundtrack as you so nicely put it.

Counterpoint: BONINOBONINOBONINOBONINOBONINOOOOOOOO

Oh, so when La Russa squeezes into a booth unannounced, he’s “defending the truth.” But when I do it, I’m “drunk” and “not welcome in this IHOP anymore.”

People who hate football (soccer) for no reason, other than the offside rule is just too complicated for them to understand, remind me a lot of Trump supporters. They hate what they don’t understand and they don’t understand a lot of things because they are fucking morons.

What’s his appeal? Not a rhetorical question. I’m sincerely curious.

And the rest of us love Deadspin even more! This is the Best Blog Column In Baseball.

I dropped a quarter this morning. It happened to roll toward a heavily bearded man, and I immediately broke down crying before it even got to him.

pretty sure the Umber’s millennial children are in charge now and they thirst for leaders who are more in touch with today’s fast-paced social-media driven society.

Live Action Role Playing. It’s a form of contraception.

Dick Pound may pooh-pooh Zika in public, but behind closed doors he and the IOC are elated that there will be a whole new generation of pinheads across the globe for them to grift.

Mark Davis is not a billionaire.

I get that they just lost someone, but it’s still disrespectful for them to dress that silly for the funeral.

We’re already having our annual aneurysm, don’t worry.