Not to be a grumpy gus, but is nobody else bothered that this doctor is posting some girl’s medical information on fucking Twitter? Is that even legal? That would piss me right off, and I’m a 40-year-old man who doesn’t really give a shit. If I were 17, I think I would be really upset by this.

Way to know your dongs, and kits, Supernintendo.

Here’s a joke! White guys from New England are smart and funny.

“Me too.”

When Lex used to compete, he used to call the sled a Human Torture Rack.

“Whatchu wanna cookie?”

Ok, I’m gonna say it. Shani Davis kinda looks like a sore loser here.

Maybe Mom heard We goin to Florida and got confused and went to warm the car up. 

I was trying to work out a way to get “Crim Son” in there where “Crim” would be short for “Criminal”, but I couldn’t figure out a way that didn’t sound racist (as opposed to just stupid as intended).