A crunchy topping is fine. Truffles? Peasant that I am, I don’t think I’ve ever had a truffle anything. Next you’ll be telling me I should occasionally wear a shirt with a collar like some British dandy.

<choking noises>

In fairness, I’m sure he personally didn’t whip up this travesty (Does Drake cook? Have a cook? All take-out all the time?). But when presented with the menu did he request this? Get talked into it? Say “Suprise me!”? Who knows!

I’m sure some five star chef makes amazing lobster mac & cheese but I’ve never been anywhere where it was very good. It’s now firmly in my “Concept is better than reality” category.

Not totally against adding something to mac & cheese like crumbled bacon bits. But raisins? Hell, why don’tcha throw a grapefruit in there, monster?

Man, why you gotta fuck with mac & cheese? It’s perfect and beautiful as is and it loves you so much. It’s always there for you. Always. But no....you gotta get all fancy and throw weird shit it it that doesn’t belong. Mac & cheese is disappointed in you...but will never turn its back on you. You remember that next…

“I was standing my ground! Paul came at me with what I thought was some kinda rabid animal on top of his head! Had to shoot!”

I wish Paul’s neighbor would just kick his ass again.

Wow. Well. I really don’t know what to say. This is more positive feedback than I received from my last therapist. You’re very kind and very generous to offer to talk. I am on Discord and also almost never use it. I have to sit with this offer for a bit. I’ve so isolated myself in about the last five years that even…

“But you can also come into the election board HQ in person with 6 pieces of ID that must all match exactly and all have current photos attached. Don’t forget to get them notarized. The board office is open every other day from 11 am to 3 pm. Please note the office is closed for lunch from noon to 2 pm.”

You’d think as a lazy lump of congealed grease, this would appeal to Trump. “Yeah, to stay safe, you all gotta do these things. So go do ‘em and don’t bother me.”

“The Trumps were much more excited to see this T-Rex walking across the South Lawn, as the visage of such a beast transported them back to the days when America was truly at its greatest.”

I am chocolate covered raisons d’être and I approve this message.

What? No love for chruch theater groups and their Xmas pageant productions? In yer face, evangelicals!

Indeed. Colostomy bags are necessary and helpful. Two things Trumps is not, has never been and never will be.

Proof again Trump is not the 5-D chess strategist a lot of his lumpen supporters think he is. All the ambulant orange colostomy bag had do do right from the start was say “Follow the CDC guidelines. That’s our best approach for managing this crisis while we put maximum effort into developing treatments and vaccines.…

Has Trump connected the final dots and claimed that Biden actively conspired with the Chinese to bring COVID-19 here to destroy America, cause a depression, arm Antifa and BLM, level the suburbs and sell your children to Satanic pizza-eating elites? Seems like Trump is thiiiiis close to tying it all together.

Finally, some truth from the administration:

We’re coming from a similar family background, sounds like. And we learned those classic behaviors in reaction and as survival\coping defenses. Your brain gets wired as a kid and you spend your adult life trying to undue some of that damage. There are so many goddamn days that the effort of it all makes you feel like…

You....you da best.