I mean...is it reeeealy confessing or is it just bragging?

Forget it, Jake. It’s Vatican Town.

Oh yeah, I get Osteen is out there peddling his brand and he’s gotta spend his donors’ money to make money for himself. And I also get that many people are looking for some spiritual guidance to help them deal with this crisis.

Not only did Goodall know about Hoffa....she was the pro brought over to do the hit. Forget all that “The Irishman” bullshit. It was The Englishwoman.

I’ve always found doing dishes to be a meditative exercise. It’s not “fun”, but it is a time to think, daydream, stare out the kitchen window. Quite calming.

Yeah, I’ve managed a couple of pulled muscles and I thought I broke a big toe the other day. Exercise is good for you, they said....

Well...ya know....a dishwasher is an awfully complex piece of equipment. All those buttons....and a door! I mean c’mon...a door for chrissakes! 

You’ve committed the Cardinal Sin. You’ve broken the dysfunctional family circle, dared to find happiness with a partner to share a better life with. You can never be forgiven and must be punished. If for some bizarre reason you returned to the fold, they would never let you forget your transgression.

No, his stance is the same as its always been. Everything is about him and his crippled ego and pure greed. He’s very consistent on those subjects.

Boy she just jumped right in with her helpful advice. We’re lucky to have her.

“The ratings are so fantastic! The public is really loving this pandemic storyline!”

Thanks for making me do homework. Shaaaaaa!

Oh this is sooooo good.

Makes you wonder if Kellyanne is staring into a mirror, carefully studying her crowsfeet....remembering when....

COVID-19 babies? No. COVID-19 murders we haven’t heard about yet? Yes.

Holy shit. Imagine the possibilities....

Right?

Yes! I’m not good at accents.

Why would he? He’s a very stable genius who understands this stuff so quickly. Everyone says so. Plus, ya know...he’s got Jared.

Wait’ll he makes Pence wear one of these. “We’re supposed to wear masks now, right? Show them your fantastic mask, Mike. See that? Get it? Get it? Plague!”