Are you guaranteeing there are no cylons in Venezuela? We have to take precautions. 

Hm see they have a lot of oil and we need that oil, so therefore we have to be involved.

I get why short-barrel rifles and automatic mods are illegal but what’s wrong with those pistols? Those look pretty vanilla to me. 

For all we know, Arizona may have a law about transporting white children. 

A better slogan “I ain’t seen shit”

I have a dark-skinned wife and we have surprisingly light-skinned kids. Other moms assume she is their nanny all the time. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if someone in fucking Arizona called the cops on her, but hooo would I hate to be the one who confronts her about it.

Are they being sarcastic because the FBI should have been able to prevent 9/11 from happening?

With the proper firearms, training, and accessories, this allllll could have been avoided. 

Didn’t he also run in the republican primary in 2008 and/or 2012? Not that factual contradictions make any difference whatsoever. 

It’s so awesome the way we do things here. Some people want to fight a war and some people don’t, so we half-fight a war. Some people want government healthcare and some don’t, so we come up with some fucked up halfway measure. Some people want to save the climate from obvious, well-known, totally foreseeable and…

It’s not that hard. Compared to Trump, we like her. Compared to the ideal candidate, we don’t like her. 

They could rent out their good players to other teams to recoup some of the losses of not operating for a year. Wait, they do have some good players right?

Los Asaltantes de CDMX

Can people just not say “queso” unless they are actually speaking spanish?

Some old white men are going to shit their adult diapers because of those tattoos. But what really matters is, will he stand for the flag and the troops?

Thomas DeLucca, if you can’t afford it, stop having baby’s.

Too much blue though.

Especially after I start cutting the power feeds to nursing homes. 

I think they are blaming school, not parenting. Boomers couldn’t help their awful liberal teachers from polluting the minds of their children.

They just don’t want to create winners and losers you know! Especially if a poor person getting to see a doctor is winning and a rich person becoming slightly less rich is a loser.