It is nice that Diego Schwartman is playing in France, but where in the world is his doubles partner Carmen San?

“With all the benefits these student-athletes are getting, we are concerned about their education.” - NCAA

Dear Karma, Buddha, Athena, Moses, et al,

Can’t wait to see Bee and Kelly’s posses join in. Gimme Bee-Stewart-Colbert-Oliver vs. Kelly-FoxFucks any day.

“There’s a emergency, quick, call the Dark Knight!...Wait, what’s that you say about Cincinnati?”

See right wingers, some immigrant Latin Americans even prevent theft.

Stormy is probably not gay, which is why when I google “Stormy Daniels lesbian video ” I do not lose the next 2 hours of my life.

The only color any owners care about is green.

This is an amazing act of kindness and the donor should be commended. However, we could eliminate the entire waiting list of people in need of an organ donation if we created and legalized a national system for donors to be paid.

The government makes a statement joking about war and death. Is it better to continue to be surprised by such things, or to convert to full-on cynicism and expect it?

“I’ve got a good relationship with my former colleagues”

I’ve been trying to get this answered in FunBag for years to no avail, so comments please have at it:

Vincent: And you know what they call a grandma who shoots a bank shot in Arizona?

I’m beginning to think that Shaq’s MBA and doctorate might not be entirely legitimate.

Fun fact: Lebron had career highs in assists and rebounds per game this year, and did so while playing in the third fewest minutes per game of any of his seasons. That is very good!

“Seinfeld, four!”

I should have clarified my sarcasm. I think the original piece is tongue-in-cheek, so the 420 grams in a pound statement is said with the same lack of truth.

Same shit? Check. Different day? Check.

420 grams is the amount that the guy actually puts in a 1lb bag of marijuana. So basically, the guy is ripping you off.

...41-year-old Tucson resident, Abdi Abdirahman.