“What’s wrong with basketball stars who can’t make shots?” - Lakers fan

“I don’t know if the answer’s yes or no, but just be cool.” - Ted Williams’s final doctor

Intentional water fowl

The final score was seven to foreskin

“See, the below-the-belt touching was consensual.” - Kobe, July 2003 and January 26, 2016

Not sure what cards he was holding at the time of his disqualification, but at least he did not leave a king-deuce on the table.

“Hands up, don’t shoot!”