My favorite line:

This dude gives me Hans Landa vibes. He tries to come across as polite and charming, but uses it as cover to do some serious dirt, if not criminal given he’s in the GQP.

House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La.) claimed in a cable news interview that he simply couldn’t recall whether he’d voted against birth control—despite doing so a little over a year ago.

1. The Republicans are majority.
2. There’s no obligation for the minority to come to the majority’s aid in determining the majority’s Speaker.
3. I cannot find a single, recent, historical example of the minority party having come to the rescue of the majority to elect a Speaker.
4. If the shoe were on the other foot,…

He and his wife look straight out of the Prime docu-series Shiny Happy People about the Duggar cultists.

You don’t understand how political parties work. How many Republicans voted for Pelosi or Jefferies for speaker over the years?

“he and his son monitored each other’s porn intake and called his son his accountability partner.”

This is so deeply disturbing but of course we’ll get nothing but crickets from the “moral majority” crowd b/c it’s their guy and they would have no values if it weren’t for hypocrisy. 

This guy is a religious zealot, far more dangerous than any of the Taliban thousands of miles away from the United States. The Republican Party, which at this point is a criminal conspiracy of fraud and insurrection, supports his insane, dangerous and frankly un-American ideology.

Such a pathetic, little man.

As a result of the ruling, Rokita will receive a public reprimand and a $250 fine.

“to cancel your vote because they hate the fact I stand up for liberty.”

Ah yes the liberty by which you mean oppressing other’s healthcare decisions that go against yours, not their, religious belief. Got it.

Great news. Rokita managed to be such a gigantic asshole in a story involving literal child rape that his will be the name remembered from all of this.

“Hard to think of much more American than[...]”

Are we sure that that’s not George Santos in a Mike Johnson costume?

Honestly, I’ve been waiting for it too. But all the tokenism and dragging him out for speeches makes me think it wasn’t sleazy, just super-racist. The same way a lot of evangelicals adopt babies from third-world countries in order to Christianize and save them, I’m guessing Mike here “adopted” a black kid in the hopes…

Unless the government is actually handing him a paper check for his pay, he’d have to have an account somewhere. The fact that one doesn’t show up makes me wonder what Caribbean island he banks with.

It is all in his church. Sorry...”church.”

This. I am much more confident that Johnson is blatantly not disclosing his holdings for reasons that make sense only to him, rather than that he has no money.

Makes the fact that his first big act is to push for defunding the IRS that much more understandable.

I am flummoxed that the take here is that Johnson is somehow one of those “broke boys”, instead of some mixture of the evils of Republican loopholes (and competent exploitation thereof) and the torrent of improper disclosure (and other financial) scandals even Jez has been covering