Every now and then I read something so good I wonder why the hell I even try...

This reminds me of a line about Antoine Walker when he was at Kentucky - "He considers himself within his range as soon as he crosses half court."

No, the disorderly conduct is a lesser included charge to the charge of being an Alabama fan. Prosecutors probably just threw that in for an easier conviction.

Excellent.

Soylent Green brand Feces Oil? I think I saw a coupon for that at Whole Foods.

So, my question is whether he maybe should have taken a second season (gasp!) at UK to get the knee back in shape and then come out as the no. 1 overall next season. Of course, bird in the hand, as they say.

I like the part about St. Louis being classy.

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I was at the Michigan/Louisville Final, and heard Michigan fans behind make jokes just like this for 3 hours.

I concur. And yet, every single time I order a Martini it either comes out with vodka, or I am asked what kind of vodka I would like.

He's also that guy that got caught masturbating in a closet at a party in college - twice.

Anyone that would make fun of an Old Fashioned or Manhattan is that guy that always runs his mouth, but is so ignorant that he is unable to recognize his own ignorance. And he's a NASCAR fan.

Gin martini, please.

Or maybe mushrooms.

That is a promotions department with a good weed dealer.

I look back now — God works in mysterious ways. It drove me into this.

Please tell me we didn't just have another Stuart Scott bravado incident.

Love it.

Love it.

Oh wow. That's nice.