Like a houseguest. Marvelous at first and full of possibilities, but if left unsupervised for too long, they can be a real pain.

Reading this brings a smile to even these cold lips.

No one's slick as Gaston

You're kind of making me rethink my cardigan collection right now.

A well laid out kitchen, including a faucet with a pull down sprayer. I actually don't mind doing dishes manually with this thing - the jet mode peels grease off dirty dishes without a lot of work.

Bacon has turned many a Jew.

"As a Jew, and as someone who has been raised to always support Israel (which, according to my parents, is my spiritual home, although I have never been)"

Assuming she grows up, that is. Justin and Caleb now have plenty of incentive to make sure that doesn't happen.

"The snide comments and casual racism here is just ridiculous."

Congratulations. Emily is gonna grow up to be literally the worst.

Good luck with the rest of fatherhood, buddy.

I meant for all the crimes they commit. It was a joke.

Not throwing anyone under the bus! We're working on a mobile version for these sorts of charts; it's a pain because of how Kinja handles iframes. Figured that until we have a solution it's better to be blunt.

Yea but this cover ain't for you, homie.

To defeat....THE HUNS!

Alright some body's gonna start this anyway so let's get it over with
FIGHTING EVIL BY MOON LIGHT!

I'm gonna have to disagree on many points. The way I have been able to almost completely remove driving angst and rage from my life in the past was to switch from fast cars to flabby cars with cruise controls, add an excellent sound system, roll down the windows and let an elbow hang out while cruising at a medium…

These are clearly good people. Teared up a tiny bit.

There's an irish restaurant near me that makes bacon egg and cheese mcgriddles with home fries and whatever sort of pancake you want, including banana. And the eggs however you want. But in sandwich form. IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS(or other holiday/celebration) ON A PLATE.