Candidate running for the President of the United States ladies and gents. Good Luck to you America.

He wants to distract from yesterday’s breaking news about his “foundation” operating illegally, and his illegal trading with Cuba.

Let’s get some things straight...

This is true.

Doesn’t have to exist, his tweets are for himself and his followers and they don’t care about facts.

For two hours?

It appears he is lying about that. Nobody can find that there is one.

Ha ha, wish I could draw better because that would make a great cartoon.

Seriously. I live in the country with Chancellor Merkel at the helm. All of Germany is collectively shaking their heads in disbelief over here.

In all seriousness, people voting for this guy need to have their citizenship revoked and be immediately exiled.

whelp I just got outted as not working

The best/worst/most predictable part of this is that she wasn’t even in a sex tape — she just posed topless for Playboy.

Assuredly the most impressive stocking cap, made by some really great people in a brilliant factory, just tremendous.

It’s so luxurious, you wouldn’t believe what people are saying about this stocking cap, I sent the best people to find my cap, they tell me this is the longest one anywhere, anywhere in the world you can’t find a better one than this, I was in China and other Asia and I see the stocking caps they have there, everyone…

How... does he know about any sex tape involving her existing anyways?

Definitely the temperament of a global leader.

Now imagine this person talking to Angela Merkel, Theresa May or Erna Solberg.

Meanwhile, Trump has been reading up in preparation for the next debate:

So if Trump knew about Miss Universe’s sex tape, did that work for or against her in Trump’s pageant? I’m leaning towards ‘for’.

More proof of his winning temperament!