Most of them were a stretch. 

Looking closely at your list, the one that really hurts most is Mustafi since he was a patented late-Wenger “see, I’m doing something” last-minute overpay. I couldn’t remember how much the fee was, so I looked it up: £35 million. Staggering. At the same time, two more defenders deserve your list: Cygan and Senderos.  

You hit the nail on the head. I watched the whole thing and could only think that we are witnessing the apex of the Inarticulate Demagogue. Whether he farts from his mouth or his ass, he drives the faithful into frenzy. 

How could you forget His Lordship?

My mother made bad lasagna, and I enjoy canned green beans from time to time to this day, so it was easy. Truthfully, I was pretty soldierly in trying to choke down things I wasn’t fond of as I went along, unless it was truly repulsive. Looking at you, liver.

Had to go with Aimee as I am certain I dismantled somewhere around 1,000 Ho-Ho’s as a kid. And had Twinkies from 1st grade through high school in my brown lunch bag. And BSC Pop Tarts are the best.

I learned that from watching the great BBC cooking show, The Two Fat Ladies. Given that there are as many pronunciations of it in the US as there are ingredients in the product, I think we would be better off adopting the British version. Also, it’s fun saying “woo-STAH sauce.” That and I dated a girl from Worcester,…

To be fair, it's a little different with knuckleballers. A knucksie can mess up your catcher for a couple of days. Or maybe it was just Varitek. He was brutal trying to catch Wakefield. 

You must never forget that at least 1/3 of the commenters on Deadspin delight in being snarky jackwipes and Captain Obvious simultaneously. 

It’s “intergluteal cleft apertures.” in a situation like this, never curb your euphemisms.

So this jackass quotes in support of his precious theory:

Sherlock: The officials knew what was going to happen, the coaches did, the players did. Ginn Jr. went down like he was shot at the 40, as expected. At least half a dozen defenders awaited him if he tried to get up. The hypothetical is pointless; I cited the rule to reinforce that all went to plan. Now, if you catch…

Completely agreed. More approachable, better real world explanations and the print is larger. The last part is important if you're trying to read and mix at the same time. JoC is great, but novice cooks don't give a hoot about Cincinnati Chili Cockaigne. Simplify!

Section 7.2.1(d) of the NFL Rulebook states a dead ball includes “when a runner declares himself down by:

Interesting that the FOX and NBC experts tweeted this shortly after it happened and the on-site ESPN rules expert did not bring it up until the game was nearly over. Maybe someone fed him the tweets. Either way, not a good way to start your new job.

I doubt the NFL has any input on the broadcasters' packaging. God help us if they did.  

The multiple fonts were disconcerting. Worse even than the electric lime down & distance. Any undergraduate with the most basic graphic arts instruction would know better. 

No, apparently that’s the NFL’s latest marketing design genius. Most of the teams I watched yesterday had them, except the Pats (didn't see any at least) and Tomlin, who undoubtedly threw his in the trash. They found one to fit Big Ben, however. 

I trust Mr. Rosenhaus explained this to Mr. Brown prior to the deal with the Patriots. Last night should have reinforced that notion. 

Four losses are a lock this season.* Harbaugh will be rearranging deck chairs on offense all season. Eventually his head will implode from media and fan pressure plus wearing Bo’s 40-year-old hat.