Folks,

You only have to graze nuts to make a guy feel like he wants to vomit. But for it to actually trigger the vom reflex, your strike has to be on point, accurate, and either ferociously hard and sharp, or savagely strong and grippy for a few seconds.

Also, throw a tsp of Roasted Garlic Better Than Bouillon in the water you boil the potatoes in.

So lucky you can cook with your mom. Mine was a fine cook, but didn’t tolerate other people in her kitchen well. I must have inherited that from her as I don’t like having people underfoot when I cook, either. Gotta work on that.

Or you can post a contrarian comment in Jezebel or The Root, then use all the hot takes to start a fire hot enough to melt steel.

I’ve done this too! By which I mean, I drank wine and egged my tiny mother on as she hacked the backbone out of a turkey twice the size of her torso with some kitchen shears. 10/10 would heckle again. (The turkey was pretty good too, tbh.)

You should hear what he says about you!

Ef that, sounds like a future me problem, and I heard that guy’s a jerk.

Thing is pots and pans have to soak. So you put them in warm water overnight and in the morning you just continue to ignore them forever until they rust away like all of life’s problems.

What if you spent a lot of time reading “how to write” essays instead of actually writing

Same story here. Our boys never ate a bite of “baby food”. They ate mushy stuff until they were able to eat less mushy stuff and chew with gums and then teeth.

We did BLW with my kid. Not because we researched it and thought it out, but because he flat-out REFUSED to eat anything mashed. Trying to get solids in him was an ongoing fight with lots of tears and food flying everywhere.

As long as they are wearing costumes, I don’t care how old they are. Show up without a costume and you only get one piece of candy with a side of disappointed glare.

I agree. I don’t have kids but I like handy out candy on Halloween. My favorites are the little ones who are all polite and excited at the same time. But I will give a piece or two of candy to anyone who comes up to the door and says ‘trick or treat’. Better that they are out trying to score free candy than getting in…

Aww she served her time as a parent. Let the lady have her fun. Besides he will probably get to say “Kids get your coats, Grandma’s Alfa is broken again and she needs a ride to her knife throwing class” -I’m assuming any older lady buying a modern Alfa is basically not into any normal old lady things.

Whenever you sneeze I will reply with “Really, it’s come to this?”

The best way to differentiate between the types of trolling:

This is true. I haven’t touched a kettlebell in months!

Ok, here goes. Writing this out makes me want to barf. 

Around five years ago, I was a TA for an undergraduate literature course that had 300 students; there were two TAs and our job was mostly to do grading (sigh) and hand out exams and set up PowerPoints and stuff of that nature. Basically, assist the professor in all manner of tedium while she lectured. Due to a…