No, you’re not the only one noticing the pre-existing wang in those shorts.

Underlying message is that only one of them - one of them - is worth a paltry minimum wage. See, we told you the were poor because they’re stupid and lazy!

I WANT TO BE THE NUX TO ALL YOU PEOPLE’S LADY MOTORCYCLE GANG

I hope this results in more attention on the gray market for children. Rehoming is common and tragic.

Cats would never do this to anyone— they just don't have the attention span. This is why I will marry my cat and live happily ever after.

Billy, I hate to nitpick, but I have a problem with the headline. The phrase "insane, masturbatory rampage" should be "insane masturbatory rampage." You shouldn't use a comma when the last adjective outranks its predecessor and is an integral part of the noun phrase. In this case, the rampage is not both insane…

WHAT ABOUT THE POOR DOG THEY DON'T LOVE?

I haz a sad.

Too bad Red Delicious apples taste like WAXY GARBAGE.

There might be some good tips in there for hiding pills in peanut butter. My giant dog licks off the peanut butter and spits out the pill, then looks at me for more peanut butter. Smartass.

I'm a huge star wars fan and barely a star trek fan, but you gave me the perfect excuse to use this image.

Seriously, why did I just do that?