I love to work out in a full Santa suit, dreaming of The Gift of My Body that I’ll be spreading to the world.

Can’t you just feel them sawing your crotch in half?

Truth. Not very compelling spokespeople for eugenics.

That’s also strict GOP Playbook: women are a Special Interest Group (not 50% of humanity), and women’s issues are Distraction Issues.

To be fair she was rather noisy and he was trying to catch some shut-eye between questions.

ugh my god I want him to do that on me

I’m sick of Kim Kardashian. Not like the normal “ugh! The U.K. gets real royalty and this is what we get? The Kardashians?” way. But in an I’m starting to hate a complete stranger way. She’s 35, married, has two kids, and I guess a media empire? At least that’s what I keep hearing. We all have a friend like Taylor…

Truth or illusion, Lauren; I don’t know the difference.

Is...is Trump hitting on that guy????

My fiance’s response to me saying that Channing Tatum is fugly is “then what do you think about me?”

Smoking the tiniest little toy pipe, and cursing in the smurfiest raspy voice.

Like his little chubby fingers would be all tobacco-stained.

Yes. That is it exactly. He looks like the saltiest, sea-dogged three year old.

Seems a little weird/creepy to me.

His kids relationship with him is so weird. His sons are desperately trying anything for his approval; it’s disturbing, because it’s obvious that he treats like badly. Tiffany is completely ignored to the point that most people did not know of her existence until the convention. And Ivanka has this weird incestuous…

I think it would have ended with my husband, and just my husband walking down the street. Because I only signed up to take care of the baby I gave birth to.

I’m surprised because, for one shining moment, he didn’t have the smallest hands in the room.

I don’t care if politicians are personally pro-life, so long as they don’t impose that on their constituents. That’s what “pro choice” means, after all.

And the big tease will be Ezekiel holding the chain leaving the viewer wondering what’s on the other end.

Oh, I think with her secondary (nowadays probably her primary) career, she’s probably seen a hell of a lot more than most of us have.