True purpose. Would also like an office addition coffee mug.

Good for frenemies so you know when to stop talking about them behind their backs.

“Laugh now, but one day you’ll rely on me to pay your social security. So, now that I think about it, maybe I’ll become a Republican.”

It’s ‘cuz of all that blood coming out of our wherevers.

Ugh, all of my extremely conservative cousins pull this patronizing act on me; they’re all a generation older, and for the last 15 years all I’ve heard is “You’ll understand when you’re older”, and “You have to grow up someday”, whenenver I disagree with them on anything. Now that I’m in my 30’s and am firmly out of…

Yup, Kasich gets the “moderate” appellation from national news only because the rest of his friends in the clown car is so fucking insane. He’s anti-choice, and it’s clear from this article why.

If it was a legitimate question I’m sure the candidate has ways of, you know, shutting the whole thing down.

General warning: just don’t go onto active train tracks. Active is pretty easy to tell: there isn’t anything in the tracks-no trees, no large amounts of trash. The tracks are empty.

Let’s not stop there. Get an MTV Movie Award! Nominate the soundtrack for a Grammy! Adapt it for a play so it can win a Tony! Hell, nominate it for an ESPY! Let’s do it, America! ALL THE AWARDS!

I hope it wins ALL the Oscars. Change the rules and let it sweep all the categories. Sorry, Matt Damon. Your Martian Oscar goes to this now. Better luck next year!

Fun fact: this is one of the most recommended documentaries in the post-Mormon community because of the parallels.

the Church has been looking to use its persuasion tactics on members of the Academy

Niceguyitis.

so there! :P

“There’s as much ‘evidence’ for the female orgasm as there is evolution, climate change, and male pattern baldness.”

It’s a sad but true fact that when Scott Walker massively reduced funding to the University of Wisconsin system, one of the first things to be cut from the budget was the Female orgasm.

I would love me some Progressive Republican leaders. Share them with the rest of us Michigan!

Given that Halloween is coming up and all sorts of stupid lore about treats laced with tricks will soon full the media, here is a simple trick to detect illicit drugs in your confections:

DAMMIT, PINKHAM.