Alan Keyes, who sounded like the Martian character on Loonie Tunes cartoons.

I hate touch screen controls in card. I’m TRYING TO WATCH THE ROAD when I change temperature controls, and can’t feel my way through the process any more.

Oh yeah...the Democratic frontrunner was a billionaire named Blair Hull (sp?) who, it turned out, liked to hit his ex-wife. I saw Obama at a candidate forum and thought “He’s great, but he’s an unknown and has a furriner name...”

I just want to say I love how angry Americans get about pizza. As our regional accents fade, we can all agree that St. Louis pizza is terrible.

I agree. I hate it when “female” is used as a noun to refer to women. Like, “You females like pumpkin spice.”

Women really can’t win in these situations. Don’t come forward, but try to protect fellow comedians by warning them about the powerful man’s transgressions: the allegations are “rumors.” Come forward, make direct accusations about your own mistreatment: results in being called a liar, being sued, blacklisting from…

She didn’t say what “it” was. A vague question gets a vague denial. A commenter on the NYT page said that was probably on advice from legal. The Cosby victims have been dragged through hell, so how many ambitious female comics would risk the same and the end of their careers.

Chicago had a Margarita Fest that ran out of Margaritas pretty early on. Oh, and also had a Youtube-famous racist rant.

Brace yourself then, because child sex dolls are sure to follow.

Especially if they are outstanding athletes.

Tampons can clog toilets

I’m not a dog owner, but even I know better to reach into an enclosed space to pat a dog. Some animals feel cornered when inside a car, or hiding under the bed, for instance.

According to this book, it’s our way of signaling that we are grown up and ready for sex. Even if the boob-grower is ten.

There’s no brand on earth that wants controversial viewpoints attached to it. That being said, it sounds like L’Oreal didn’t do their homework before bringing her on board.

There are more dignified means of remembering Tubman; putting her image on cash will be a field day for anonymous white racists. Black Americans will have to deal, on a daily basis, with racial slurs scrawled across the bills.

I found a combination of direct confrontation and indirect correction works with passive aggressive comments from my mom.

I saw Pumpkin Spice madeleines at 7/11 today. Even Proust is now basic.

Gizmodo empire seems to have Harvey coverage scattered among various blogs, so I’ll just park this here. Port Arthur is completely under water. The recovery center is flooded, and refugees are huddled on bleachers. And, another nursing home is filling up with water. Some residents are reporting that the Cajun Navy…

On the plus side, his FUPA prevents any “accidental” dick-to-butt contact.