I wrote a cat simulator a few years back. Maybe not what you're looking for tho.

That was amazing. I normally hate stuff like this. Fan films are usually so awful. But that was astonishing.

It's a logistical problem. This isn't GTA. You can't give Batman the ability to run over citizens. You just can't. Also, if it were GTA Batman, you'd be getting this game in 6 years instead of 3. So they have to concoct some reason all the citizens are gone or inside.

Yes, most games have never been great at depicting realistic jyggle physics. It's not the best situation, but at this point, many of us are used to that. The breast physics on Ryse, though? I don't even know what is going on there.

And for god's sake don't read books either!

For those who are saying that if Fish couldn't take games industry criticism, he should leave the industry, I'm reminded that bullies bullied a girl into killing herself at my school a couple years ago. Would you say to her that if she can't take life that she should leave? Well, she did.

Also this, no?

Both this and Beyond: Two Souls are basically 1984's Firestarter, by Stephen King. Anyone see that? Except that the folks chasing this talented young lady are decked out SWAT dudes instead of doofuses in suits. Seems from the trailer that you'll be playing this dude with a gun instead of the time-shifting girl. There…

Are you a man? They've done studies and this is how men shop. Interestingly, if you are a man and you have to wait more than 5 minutes in line, you are some significant amount more likely to just drop the item and leave - saying to yourself that you'll come back some other day.

While Kotaku's doing this weeklong Mass Effect autopsy/celebration I thought I'd mention where the Doctors got the term from. It's a medical term. When you have a brain tumour, as it grows, it displaces the brain around it, squeezing it against the hard skull. That's a "mass effect". I grabbed this sentence from…

Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast was THE BEST Star Wars game I have ever played and it continues to be, like, a decade after it was released.

What's blowing my mind is that that monitor it's being played on is MY MONITOR. So I'm watching this video of a game being played on...etc.

I am aware, thanks! But it's not enough. And I am not fond of the PAX GFW panels, either, because then they're talking in a line. There is a different energy when they are all in a room together, sitting around a table, munching on things, and just talking to each other. They're a lot less self-conscious. So I just…

If there were a GFW - THE BRODEO kickstarter - with the money going to FLYING them into the same city for a WEEKEND, and then recording like, 4 new episodes over that time, with a fifth drunken episode - I would totally contribute something like $500. I still have all their old episodes on my ancient ipod, and…

i use a rubber band. gives me great grip

AWKWARD FISTBUMP

Reminds me of that kitten killer, Luca Magnotta. Am I the only one?

Coming out sooner than I thought. Amazing.

Thanks, Ubisoft.

Tits are NSFW, but KILLLING LIKE 30 PEOPLE is fine.