... “To make sure there is a pair of beavers for every box.”

There are Jeremy Renners in every profession.

I have very long, thick hair and one morning on the train to work a woman sitting behind me started petting it. She then seemed offended when I politely asked her to knock it the fuck off. Unsolicited hair touching is weird and inappropriate.

Cheers!

My ex and I broke up about a year ago, and I am still recovering. Needless to say that 30 second snippet turned my eye faucets on. The full album will probably leave me wrung out. I can't wait.

Is there anything the boomers won't fuck up for the rest of us?

I won an orange goldfish with black spots at my elementary school fun fair and named him Dr. Crush. Dr. Crush lived to a ripe old age of 6ish months, and when I found him dead in his bowl (actually an old glass coffee carafe) I was devastated. I think I was 9 or 10.

Estrogen Cabal would be a killer band name.

I’ve taken Ambien on and off for years with no blackouts, but on several occasions I’ve watched my sister walk around seemingly awake, mumbling gibberish as she lays waste to the food in the fridge like a sleepwalking Bigfoot. She didn’t believe me until I eventually caught her on video one night.

Depends how premature. My bestie was only 7.5 months along when she went into labor and delivered her daughter. It was a very easy pregnancy; she woke up in the middle of the night to go pee and her water broke. Her daughter was born tiny, just 4 lbs, but all vital bits were fully developed and she was allowed to take…

They both seem like assholes. Team No Thanks.

I like to drink Tea Tonix Be Sleepy tea at night to help fall asleep. I’ll steep a strong cup and it makes my body calm and my eyes droopy.

Aaaannnd...there it is.

Right? It’s still clearly popular so good on her.

I also have not gotten over losing Munch. I love Olivia, but if Finn were to leave SVU, I think that would be the end for me.