The guy who speculated about the size of his infant daughter’s future breasts? The guy who posed on a bed with his pubescent daughter and later said if she wasn’t his daughter they’d be dating? The dude who in public, while running for president, said that the thing he had most in common with his adult daughter was…

I used to tell that lie at bars in Chicago, but I embellished it by explaining that they were gyro cows and you had to feed them oregano and only the downslope leg would get big enough to fit on the gyro rotisserie. I got s lot of free drinks with that story. 

When I was seven or eight, my dad told me cows that live in the mountains had longer legs on one side of their body so they were able to stand on the slopes. Regular cows would fall over in the mountains. I totally believed this. The next school year we studied adaptive behaviors in animals like those fish in…

And just yesterday I was regaled with multiple variations of “Trump didn’t even know Epstein”, “you’re stretching tying him to Trump”, or my favorite after we’ve all seen photos of the two together “Trump isn’t cool enough to hang with Epstein”.

LMAO
*gets popcorn*

Deers!

It looks so peaceful.

Even doggos love a good sunset. Beautiful! Enjoy your new crib and hood.

Super nice!

Yes - exactly and her poor friend Woody Allen, who she continues to believe... Diane is just ditzy and wants to objectify men - Oh! She’s such a crazy, goofy girl! 

B.

confession time (that no one cares about cuz who cares what i think) but i loathe diane keaton. absolutely cannot stand her. i do like some of her movies, but not her.  i don’t like her schtick - its not endearing, its annoying and silly and stupid.

Alex is out; the accosting continues.

That t-shirt must have been a deliberate choice. To me it seems like a martyr pose. Yes, it’s an actual Metallica shirt. But “after a year or so” I am tempted to read his choice as “I’ve ridden the lightning and I’m ready to go back to how things were before”.

Complaining about “cancel culture” is the new complaining about “PC culture.” And both are just attempts to avoid being personally responsible for the impact of your words.

I wouldn’t even call the babe article “allegations of sexual misconduct” there was nothing legally actionable there. Using this language to frame the whole narrative makes it about “sexual assault” (which the narrator was clear didn’t happen). It was never about that for me personally (and I think most people?), but…

“I just felt terrible that this person felt this way.”

That crazy bitch doesn’t have enough face for her head size.

As an Elder Millennial/Baby Gen Xer (the internets say this makes me a “Xennial”), the rediscovery of the great Keanu Reeves fills me with a deep sense of peace and validation. My 13 year old self was right!!! Keanu IS the greatest of the 90s hunks!

An actual conversation I had with a friend the summer BW came out.

ps HULLO haven’t seen you (or your wonderful posts) around for a bit! mb ive just been missing them