“It’s such a bizarre statement” says man writing 500 words to defend a flaming bag of shit take.

It’s Buffalo! Not exactly a place with a lot to celebrate. Let them eat yellow cake.

They are trying to feature a “Madden” style skycam deployment on more plays, especially on Thursday nights (I think) after the excessive foggy game earlier this year where they were forced to use it. It makes for a much more enjoyable experience for watching the plays unfold in real time. Not that I expect that to…

*left handed

Any list of shitty grass in NFL stadiums that does not include Soldier Field is, by default, garbage.

Several ESPN and other on-air personalities just refer to them as “Washington” almost exclusively, but that doesn’t quite have the same punch as using RedHawks.

This was really just a way to get a bunch of embedded ads for casinos located on reservations some traffic from the hoax sites. Native native advertising, if you will.

Seeing One’s Cherished Stars Gradually Erode is actually the name of my new memoir about Deadspin commenting, pick it up for the holidays.

20 HR and 100 RBI looks pretty good at first glance, but a -1.8 WAR, 53 runs scored, .241 avg, and a .286 OBP in 2017 says more about the dumpster fire of a lineup the Angels are rolling out than Pujols when talking about productivity.

May as well include Jason Heyward’s dismal performances for the Cubs to balance things out with a player with a mega-contract doing the Cards a favor.

Neither are hemorrhoids, but that doesn’t mean people are clamoring for them.

As a normal human being, I am really sorry that the best slugger in baseball’s career-altering decision of where to uproot his family and move to play for the best remaining years of his career after suffering in one of the worst franchises in baseball for seven years was not made on a timetable amenable to you.

cardinals fans are absolutely shocked and disgusted. They thought they were getting a superstar player, but it turns out he is of African American and Puerto Rican descent.

They were afraid Zach Miller might lose a leg or die after his gruesome leg break because he tore an artery, so just because it’s not neck/spine doesn’t mean they can’t potentially be as dangerous. Ware’s takes the cake for me in terms of unwatchability.

The winner of the annual Monmouth-Hofstra game gets the coveted “Two-Schools-That-Sound-Like-A-Man-With-Peanut-Butter-In-His-Mouth-Trying-To-Pronounce-Two-Entirely-Different-Words” Cup.

I’ll star this from beyond the grays so everyone will have to share the pain of reading it.

....Kickception

At my alma mater, it always felt like the real gatekeepers were the people scanning tickets to get into the stadium (pun not intended) in terms of policing drunk folks. I was refused entry to the last home game of my senior year because I probably was wobbling around or slurring my words. He was very nice, just a…

Joke’s on you, Gould. This loss guarantees the Bears a better draft pick and I know John Fox and Ryan Pace will draft a way sicker kicker with that high first rounder.