This is literally the origin story of She-Hulk.

"Remember when Catwoman wasn't a burglar and didn't fight Batman? That was the best movie ever, right?" is probably where these clauses came from. I suspect that a decade from now, a later version of this contract will be the one that prevents an idiot movie studio's decision that the perfect Miles Morales is whatever…

The awesome thing is that I thought we lived in a world with weaponized anthrax, right-wing racists stockpiling guns, ISIS slowly carving up the Middle East like so much ham, and drug cartel death squads. But two different people in this thread alone have said Apple is "giving in to terrorism", so I guess that's the…

Oh, don't worry, there will be people lamenting Apple abandoning their previous stance. Anytime a musician does anything besides give away chocolate with an optional take-a-penny-leave-a-penny bowl by their feet, there will be someone on the internet calling them greedy assholes.

I assume the lack of "in a sketch-show on youtube" in the last sentence is your way of saying that you are just an illusion and I can get 200xp if I pass my disbelieve check.

Well, problem solved. Apple has just announced that they're going to pay royalties during the free trial period after all. They're going to somehow have to find a penny here and there in the $150 billion of cash they just have lying around.

"Why, they're advertising their car as a lemon! Am I so out of touch? … No, it's the Germans who are wrong."

It doesn't matter if Connery should've had that power, he did anyway. Thank a lot, stupid judges who decided R. v. Movie Guys Who Held Sean Connery's Family Hostage In A Secret Cabin.

Good news, CraveTV customers! If you could already watch anyway because you've got cable, now you can pay more to watch it… on a computer!

It happened in the shadows.

I see what you're wanting here.

I think it's kind of unfair to condemn him this early for ruining Tron 42. Wait and see if he ruins Tron 15 first.

If you say "the original Ghostbusters" and there isn't a gorilla in a beanie, there's still a tiny speck of me that's disappointed. So if anyone from Filmation is reading this, screw you for poisoning my youth.

It can't be CBS because people will be watching this morning show.

Cheated? That's what they wanted you to think!

They will be putting out casting calls for guys whose watches have broken fobs and girls whose hair combs are broken.

In the context of being on a reality television show? 50/50, done and done, I'm now going to spend the next 36 hours of filming reading 90s Daredevil comics on my iPad. If I keep anything more I'm guaranteed to be edited to look like a monster. If I keep anything less, well, I'd rather be edited to look like the sort…

Please, tell your friends about this fictional British detective.

You know, I really do hope you're being paid to go out and tell the internet that Cosby has to be innocent because bitches are crazy and women are liars and scammers, because it's sort of sad if you have so little self-reflection that you really do believe what you're saying, and think that I wasn't referring to you,…

I see that the nuts-and-sluts-defense team have caught on that their comment history would give away how they're cut and pasting the same things into Disqus on multiple sites, so now they've got their history set to private.