If the latter, is it one from a table in a cheap bar, with a lit candle in it?

Are you me???
I could have said everything in your comment.

My mother is embarrassing, too.

Why do you think Mrs p and I (both accountants) have stayed together for nearly 20 years? It's been one long party.

Do you remember the old Saab TV ads with the jet?

Miss o, now Mrs p, was into long-haired guitarists when she was 19 (wasn't every hetero girl in the mid-90s?). I had short hair and no musical ability.
Obviously my charm won through…
And she was also my first and only ever blonde girlfriend.

Upvoted for the sentiment, not short relationships. Thank you.

My office. 9.20. Executions!

Humanity is great on the whole.
There are one or two bastards, but we can't let one bad apple ruin the barrel.

I found hope from the depths of my depression. As Harlan Leverage III said above, I had several layers of fear. The most real to me was the fear of hurting Mrs periscopes.

Oh, I don't change it often. She has two flavours of one type of biscuit meal, and three flavours of a wet meal (the latter just twice a week - she only eats the gravy if she gets it more often), but will suddenly decide that she doesn't like something any longer.

Ricky Kitty and the Claws ftw:

My cat is extremely fussy, to the point of not eating fir two or three days if she disagrees with my opinion on food.

How far away is that bloke behind though?

What about Burns?

I remember a contemporary review of TPM, which said that "Neeson carries his gravitas like a suitcase" in that movie. It really did seem like his ability as an actor was a burden in the film.

I know, but she does say things like "you'll have to cal an ambulance if there's lemon in there".
Mrs p has a wide range of allergies, and only the worst could lead to anaphylaxis. But they're all far more serious than her mother's - it just seems weird to me how much my mother-in-law makes of it.

Upvoted, despite being made incredibly sad.

Great call.
It was a tiny thing - an old, stone, circular structure with a room on each floor. The problem with rooms being circular, and France having some amazing wine, is that room-spinning drunkenness is a horror all of its own.

How do you titillate an ocelot?