So we’re calling plastic surgery a relatively minor kidney procedure now? Trump couldn’t come up with a better lie than that? Slipping, like Melania’s cheekbones.

I’m a gay dad, but as far as I’m concerned - anyone who is absolutely sure without a doubt in their mind that they want children is insane. It’s stressful and expensive and fraught with potential tragedy.

I’ve always been 99% sure I didn’t want kids, but I knew I was 100% sure when I learned I needed a hysterectomy (huge fibroids that were causing multiple issues and would more than likely return if I didn’t get rid of that damn uterus). The second my doctor told me I needed to get rid of that organ, my brain went “YES!…

Exactly. To me it read like gaslighting.

I am SO glad they included the audio in the NYT article. People need to HEAR how the men in the room COMPLETELY disregarded everything she had to say about it

This part was rough to read too:

My husband took my name. It made the most sense. My name is objectively better (shorter, easier to spell, more phallic), and I already lost it once in my first marriage and my husband didn’t want me to have to do that again. He gets more praise for it than you would fucking believe. And when people find out he adopted…

I imagine the name change also makes divorce more humiliating for the woman. She has to either change her name again, or carry around the name of a man to whom she is no longer married.

Um, I think I love you. Seems like you’re the only one on here who truly understands/cares how fucked up this persistent tradition is.

Good for you for not pressuring your wife to take your name, but isn’t it funny how men with long, hard to spell names never change theirs?

If your family unit requires the same name to be held together, you have much bigger problems than the paperwork for a name change.

If it was really just for family unity, then as many men as women would take their spouses last name. But they don’t. So clearly it’s not just about family unity.

People get hung up on the idea of ever-expanding hyphenated names, but the simple solution of A-B marrying C-D would be to choose one name from each (e.g., A-D). The default, egalitarian way of handling that would be for a husband to keep the portion of his name from his father and a wife to keep the portion of her…

What about same sex couples?

I know there are always Reasons but it’s funny how it always ends up with the woman changing her name to her husband’s. This isn’t meant as a personal attack, I just do think that there are a lot of ways that society and relationships subconsciously influence women’s decisions and push them to stick with the…

Husband and I didn’t change our last names. Our child has my last name as a middle name and his as a last name. The compromise was that I got to pick her first name (though husband liked it too).

Jack White (né Gillis) took Meg’s last name . FWIW.

It’s not a harmless practice though. If it were, more men would change their names. But they don’t. Which makes it clear that it’s a sexist bullshit tradition that is demeaning to women and makes it clear that a woman’s identity is less valuable than a man’s.

Do whatever the fuck you want. Just ask yourself WHY women are expected to relinquish their name and why people who buck that tradition are questioned.

Never understood why anyone changes their name in marriage at all. My wife didn’t change hers, neither did my mom, so maybe I’ve got a warped perspective on this.