DAMMIT, PINKHAM.

The Reuben one reminded me of a story Terry Pratchett told. He said that one jet-lagged evening he accidently asked for Three Mile Island dressing for his salad. The waitress didn’t say a word, just brought him Thousand Island dressing and a bottle of hot sauce.

I spent a year dead for tax reasons, once.

Co-worker had a t-shirt ‘I’ve used up all my sick days, have to phone in dead’ I once told the boss I had 24 hour Kuru

I had a boss pull something very similar to the first story. I had just got a new truck, well new to me, it was 7 years old, and my boss asked me and a few other of the delivery guys to come to his house one morning because he needed help with something. That was all he told us. So we show up, and it turns out he…

So, when I was in kindergarten, I wasn’t allowed to carry an umbrella on the bus.

Hugs for you. And now being loud: the kid’s dad and I were initially separated and then ended up back together because of a mess of horrible things that happened all together, at once. The relationship was dead in the water so there was no chance of this working out- and after many years of trying to push him out and…

I’m oddly grateful to Trump’s idiot lawyer for raising this issue. I think a lot of people are ignorant about how absolutely archaic US laws regarding rape, abuse and other acts by a husband towards his wife are and were very recently. It’s useful to remind everyone on a regular basis that most of our laws regarding…

“Do you make your sandwiches with bread?”

I’ve entertained the thought of getting back together with my ex. Similar to the guy in the letter, we had our ups and downs, but it’s like Dr Nerdlove said, it’s the familiarity that makes us want to get back together with them.

Costello: You see the thing is that these rappers today, they’ve got the funny names. The unusual names you see and if you’re going to be buying stolen Jewels from them you need to learn their names. So let’s start, first up we have 50 cent

The rooms are only available for women

Serious question? Why only women? I would think some men would also benefit from letting all that shit oooouuuut.

Did this with 5 friends a while ago, here is the best part

Jamie Layton’s story reminds me of a famous story I heard when I was working at a regional theater festival.

In other news, Nickelback has filed several dozen lawsuits against Nickelback

you're 100% being a jerk the snow blows off your roof making it harder to drive behind you.

Toronto could probably support two teams, but are they really going to give the same city two new teams in the same expansion?