What sort of naïf has faith in the judicial system to begin with these days?

Not his style. He’d go cash, man.

Can’t even make it to the winter meetings. Jeets is showing about as much range as GM as he did at shortstop.

I’d rather see Daniel Day-Lewis as Jeff Fisher.

Could you imagine what Day-Lewis’ method acting technique would involve for this? He’d have to sit in a dark room, with the curtains closed, and watch hundreds of hours of Jeff Fisher interviews. After a week, he’d be mumbling “7-9...7-9...” to himself while rocking back and forth.

“With the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th picks of the 2019 NFL Draft, the Cleveland Browns select...”

Shit, well, now who is Trump going to root for in the Olympics?

yes

Jeter gift basket jokes are so old, Roy Moore doesn’t even notice them while walking through the mall.

We need Moore of this

True story:George Washington couldnt even be bothered to listen to it one time before he died.

Trump, who probably comments on Deadspin under the handle PussyGrabber, would be conflicted about starring this. I mean, it’s unflattering to him, but makes fun of a disabled person who was also a Democrat.

I’m going to hell for laughing at this. +1

Robert Kraft with the chair.

A mysterious series of lightning bolts striking both Goodell and Jones simultaneously.

I’m guessing those Blue Lives Matters assholes are going to be conflicted as all hell. On the one hand, they’re going to argue that the drunk chick had it coming. On the other, black guy. Truly a Sophie’s choice situation for them.

I thought the alt-right already had an official greasy, orange pile of garbage that makes your stomach cramp just by looking at it

+1 the sinners are much more fun

Since he is going on Sean Hannity’s show it sounds like he would rather cry with the sinners than laugh with the Saints