As Deadspin’s mandated Matt Schaub defender, I’ll point out that he’s still on NFL rosters four years after the Texans waived him.

I’ll call my dad. Every trip to their house is a hilarious tug-of-war between him watching CNBC and my mom watching the Today Show until noon on the kitchen/family room TV.

On top of that, North Carolina has Boone and Asheville in the west, Raleigh-Durham and Charlotte, plus the Outer Banks and Winston-Salem for reasonable places to be. It sounds like he just did North Carolina wrong?

It’s also just the early clay season and he’s 14-4 for the year?

Good try, but whatever happens is going to find those holes for the seat belts and seat belt fasteners.

I starred this because it’s well-written, but I feel like milk barf has to be the minimum for the really good stories. I did milk barf many times, including once in the first hour of a 16-hour car ride home from the beach.

Seriously, he hasn’t even been activated for a game yet in the playoffs. If I had nothing better to do, I’d rather be in Los Angeles too. Do we have any Kevon Looney quotes?

Fire Doc, eat the $20 million, then go from there. Healthy (LOL) Paul/Jordan/Griffin and a plan is still pretty good, like 2nd in the NBA good, behind the Warriors. This team is so fucked up with Crawford/Rivers/W Johnson being paid two years out.

I know a lot of Tar Heels and I keep asking them why Trubisky couldn’t start over Marquise Williams if he was this good. More than one said that because Williams was better.

Not the same. LeBron was different and backed it up, fast. We’re legitimately asking whether he’s the best player ever.

But what you’re saying is you won’t teach because grad school teaching was bullshit. From what I’ve heard, it is (I didn’t, I went to business, then came back after 15 years). I get your point, but we actually pay a living wage, with significant benefits.

I, unfortunately, watch more ACC football than anyone that doesn’t get paid for it, so this is my release.

Middle and high schools are in desperate need of good teachers and we pay better. You also make more of a difference.

You would be appreciated. Seriously.

But, yay North Carolina?

Pretty much. Wouldn’t be surprised to see them try to move Kanter, considering Donovan clearly doesn’t trust him anymore, but they won’t get value.

And they’re pretty much stuck with the same team for next year, barring a trade. No roster flexibility at all, already over the cap, and they were supposedly looking to lock up Roberson as of a few weeks back. I presume they pick up Grant’s team option and let Gibson and Collison walk.

I feel like I read an article a month or so ago that said Vitale had a job for life, but the tradeoff was that he would not get the top games anymore, and his contract reflects this. He’s probably cheap now.

It’s weird, right? I’ve never understood why tall people are valued more in a game where height is important and scarce.

Porter and Beal (and Bogdanovic) just need to be their regular season selves. I really think that’s it, and I would expect them to get through comfortably. If anything, Wall’s been playing over his head. Atlanta’s not stealing a road game, right? I don’t care about the Wizards, but this doesn’t even seem desperate…