Cheetah would have been the obvious choice here.

+1 Bad Moon Rison

“bullshit”

Still has to bide his time until Drew Bledroach gets injured.

I haven’t seen this big a burn from Atlanta since Sept. 1, 1864.

this is also an acceptable response

It’ll be amazing because Mark is going to play the roles of Tom Brady, Danny Amendola, Julian Edelman, and Rob Gronkowski.

Porn

come again?

That’s a way better idea. For example:

Her opponent later admitted that it was the longest he ever lasted with a girl.

“Because they have no union. They are not organized. And therefore they are at the mercy of their company.”

This is all great, but things aren’t really going to get better under Cheeto Benito unless people just start actively defying the office of the President. It’s terrible to think that we have arrived at a point where civic responsibility suggests active defiance of the rule of law in this country, but the law is now…

I’m 1,000x more afraid of being killed in a road rage incident by a Trump supporter with a handgun than I am about being harmed by a Muslim from another country.

This is news that directly concerns the automotive industry. And no, not by any objective measure would a wall/tariffs/anything at all be worth it.

So...he’s Kellyanne Conway?

Why not print the sports information director’s report? It’s good practice for a future as a sports business reporter, publishing press releases verbatim.

WHAT’S IN THE BOX DARREN

Yeah, and if you don’t like what they write you can just get them expelled.

Singer-ection?