Wait, now the other David’s dead too???!? Or are they both still sleeping? 

Wait, David’s dead??!?

How many inner Elaines do you contain?

Well I can guarantee that behind closed doors when he’s raging about football players, Omarosa, or the Obamas, he uses that word freely. And for SHS, the tape is in her head playing on loop. 

Confirmed: Boris Johnson a) doesn’t own matching cups or b) a clean shirt or c) a comb and d) can’t be bothered to water his lawn.

Donald Trump Jr., a man who has perfected the 1980s corrupt hedge fund manager aesthetic

Definitely Space Farce.

[recycling an old joke]

Hope not!

Donald Trump after the blue wave sweeps both houses in November:

You forgot to say, “Amirite?”

I would definitely place a bug in his toilet so I could hear him talking to himself, à la Robert Durst. Which come to think of it is probably what Putin had his goons do and why when Putin snaps his fingers, Trump comes running.

Stealing that.

I’m impressed by your knowledge. And by your dedication in maintaining a peeve your whole life.

I lived on a quiet street when our son was three. One day while I was taking care of him at home, someone knocked on the door. It was a woman who had been driving down the street and came to a stop when she saw my son sitting in the street. That was many years ago now, and I don’t remember how long he had been out of…

I just checked: there’s nothing real or serious going on in Trump’s brain.

[Koch]...makes the ridiculous statement that what President Trump is doing is unfair to “foreign workers.” He is correct, AMERICA FIRST!

Well whether or not the actual War on Christmas® is a thing. What I can’t quite fathom is why so many Christians are content to take religious instruction from a man who is literally Satan incarnate.

Collusion is not a crime