Ha ha - I admire the salesman who can assure you that you’re getting a steal. And then charge you $22K for a car that would have sold for $27K two years ago. Chutzpah!

Yes, it’s not like Richard Nixon was involved in a scandal about water. It would be more fun if we chose to name our scandals after Bill Clinton’s: diesellatio.

Health issues be damned! You should have seen the first draft of this bill where Rahm Emanuel wrote that anyone who still had 10 digits at the end of high school would be held back and forced to take another year of shop class until they stopped being such slackers.

Ha ha, I’m well over 40 and even I barely remember what a cheque is let alone how to balance a chequebook. But yes, snark aside, everything you said is absolutely correct.

Does this guy have anything better to do with his life?

OK, but what if I’m searching for a pair of dropped contact lenses at the bottom of a pool, swimming quarry, or ocean, will this trick work to restore my eyesight well enough to locate them?

Why can’t they leave Britney alone?

Getty Lee?

i assume, whales being intelligent, that a few of them are assholes too.

I will not make a “push him back into the ocean” joke. I absolutely refuse to, as much as he deserves it for being such an unrepentant asshole, because that would be wrong.

So shade or no shade? This part of the CNN statement: “his first meeting with Vladimir Putin,”

I vote intern. There has to be some Jonah Ryan type(s) running amok in the White House ready to perform the most degrading acts short of fellatio for short-fingers-in-chief.

Nah, Angela Merkel would never tweet something like that.

That’s kind of what they did with Dick Cheney. Of course medically speaking, the new heart was more for appearances than anything else. Lizard people like him don’t need blood flowing through their veins, just the monthly sacrifice of innocents.

Yeah, the funny thing is that Trump probably does have the power to get David Pecker, owner of the National Enquirer to kill a story should he wish. This is because Pecker is an extremely loyal friend of Trump’s and is completely in the tank for him.

Absolutely, but then people would be forever (HA - I mean for 3 minutes) wondering if it was real or not. At least this way, we know.

I mean it couldn’t have been that hard to fake it, right?

I wouldn’t go so far as to call Trump the new Hitler, but it sure looks like the NRA is encouraging its members to be the new Brownshirts.

Keep digging your own grave, little man.

I think his promise of victory for America provides a clue as to his intentions. He’s getting ready to (or has already secretly) declared a new War on Healthcare. (Eat your heart out, LBJ.)