I'm a fan of The Walking Dead and even I don't like it.

I don't buy the whole "guns vs zombies" approach. Your average schmoe is not a marksman, and guns are loud. I feel you'd end up mobbed by zombies who heard you shooting and missing long before you could actually deal with your initial zombie/s.

I like Hicks, but I think some of his delivery lets down his writing. He could deliver a lot of his work in a more wry, deadpan manner like European comedians (and he was a lot more beloved in Ireland and the UK than in the US, at least in his own lifetime), but he puts a level of overemphasis on things that lets the…

I did go through a phase at uni where I only owned a TV for the purpose of providing a screen for a DVD player/console, but this was during a slump in UK/Irish free TV—I knew there was good stuff out there, but it was all on subscription channels; the fare I could get with just a TV and aerial didn't do it for me.…

What's wrong with Alex Jones? I guess the Welsh accent is a bit polarising but she's a wonderfully cheery presenter and gorgeous to boot.

I'm not re-appraising his artistic merits based on his personal scumbaggery, but it is the thing that singles him out for me as the hack I hate, not the hack I dismiss. I'd rate his films (especially the supposedly "good" ones) in the same category, as far as my personal opinion of their quality, as perhaps Roland…

I'll add the caveat that the first one is actually a good thriller, but after that they went tits up. There's a mystery in the first one that's begging to be solved, but when it goes beyond that one room it loses all sense of tension and interest.

Polanski. I've had the misfortune of sitting through several of his films during a brief film course at uni (The Pianist, Rosemary's Baby, Chinatown and … Frantic, I think? The Harrison Ford one) and they were all terrible, just terrible. So couple that with the fact that the man's a manipulative child-rapist and I…

Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark.

Old man Durst looks like Ricky Gervais' embarrassing brother. Except Gervais is already terrible so I dunno where I'm going with this.

That's good, because those hand-crotch trousers are just horrible all the way around.

Can I still shit on Yoko for her actual work, though?

One time, while more than a little high, I had this idea about a film where it turned out Cobain, Layne Staley and Andrew Wood were all killed by some grunge-hating serial killer, like Seven with a very Alice in Chains soundtrack. I don't know if that's overly relevant or even entirely respectful but there it is.

And here I was thinking that just watching that episode constituted paying too much attention to it.

What, are there two versions of it or something? Because the Mia Farrow/Rapefuck McGee version is one of the worst things I ever saw.

Isn't MGS3 harder when you kill The End early, since he's replaced with a dick-tonne of dudes instead?

I have zero interest in these far-future jobs but damn is she pretty. Also I don't get how salami is like a "thing" that could "happen". It's just tasty good food. That's my contribution to this.

Who'd ever have thought a derivative series based on a piss-poor film would review badly?

Charted in the US, though, and 80s nostalgia has been on the wax.

In my mind this will play out like a version of Get Christie Love! with Rashida Jones in an afro wig. Also in my mind I am masturbating furiously.