"In this household, we watch Die Hard and only Die Hard!!!"

So if drugs gave us The Velvet Underground and the absence of drugs gave us Lou Reed trying to rap, your PSA may not be hitting the intended mark.

Don't forget to pick up your lawn-slob-art on the way!

And at least 50% of that is them suffering at the hands of Christmas!

Aaaaaaaaand out come the Sublime-haters!

If you're going to buy some minimally grating kids' music, skip the Muzak and just get them some They Might Be Giants.

I only give my heart to total fuckwads.

Blame Elf. I don't remember ever hearing it or of it until it popped up in that movie.

"Last Christmas" is up there, too, though I do have fun changing the chorus to "The very next day, you said you were gay."

I really don't feel as if there's any way that this song could be worse than "Last Christmas" or "Wonderful Christmas Time." Unless you're at war with Christmas.

He probably won't even say "Santa Claus," opting instead for "Jolly Fat Fuck."

Surprised to see the new Wilco album on this list. It was actually pretty weak.

Action-packed!

Oh, totally agreed that it's not for everyone, but whenever I see an article about Eddie Izzard, Margaret Cho, Woody Allen, or someone similarly unfunny, I just pass it up and keep going. The Tim and Eric haters just can't resist, for some reason.

Is there anyone out there who thinks that Tim and Eric is just really unfunny crap that's really nothing more than gross-out garbage? Because the rest of us here are anxiously awaiting your comment.

Whatever she's having in When Harry Met Sally.

Sounds delicious! But does it go well with concrete?

Coulda used more horseradish.

Why are you torturing yourself, Alex? It's perfectly acceptable to be mostly vegetarian. Stop making something as wonderful as food into a cold, sterile lifestyle choice.

As long as she can make Shelly Duvall have a nervous breakdown on the set, she'll do fine.