Carry-on! Fuckin’ carry-on! C’mon. Really? Carry-on? Somehow he got past the place where they check to see if something is too big to be a carry-on, (“excuse me, please, we’re important”) and he got as far as TSA? There, the brough-ha-ha about the bear and not fitting in the scanner would tie up at least one TSA…

Then the bear will be forced to become a prostitute to survive, and will ultimately die from a drug overdose. Merry Christmas, y’all!