i went to a university where women outnumbered dudes by roughly 3 to 1. so, when you're a shy freshman nerd with no play and you're invited to go watch EXORCIST III with half the women in the dorm and you're sandwiched between them on the couch, trust me when i say it will be one of the best movie going experiences of…

savvy English?

fair to say.

right? i figured Starz might be a subsidiary of Univision or something but maybe they just sold them ad-space or something. i mean, this is only "news" in the same way that TVGuide could be considered news… but i'm sure it was an easy way to meet deadline and has resulted in a couple dozen page clicks.

BREWERS FAN: drinks another beer and sighs, thinking about anything else but what is taking place on the field.

when i was growing up, Big Boy was awesome - we used to get a bucket of fried perch and french fries, although i guess that might have been due to our proximity to the Great Lakes…

(consults with the judges) We also would have accepted "assholes"!

huh.

it probably would make pretty decent popcorn shrimp, to be honest.

Jennifer Connelly is a babe.

The Departed takes it into 21st century, what with the cell phones and all.

dude, i just had an incredibly Milhouse "So this is what it feels like when doves cry"-moment. right down to mention of Run The Jewels!

despite being a huge fan of Body Count and a less zealous enjoyer of both Ice T and Slayer, i found their track to be the biggest disappointment on the album.

i always loved how that one dude asked "Anybody wan' a ham sammich?"

i had the album on tape and two buddies bought the compact disk and none of us had the tracks in the same order. i don't know if i read something in a magazine or it was just a theory cooked up while listening to the album with a few beers, but i was always under the impression they released random arrangements of the…

so, would anthony michael hall have been the same wimpy loser who gets the ned beatty DELIVERANCE treatment, or would he have been revealed as some stealth badass who'd been taking kickboxing and krav maga classes ever since high school? i can see it going either way, although i guess i'd much rather see judd nelson…

i still love more than half this album - faith no more/boo ya tribe is still my favorite jam, spooky and aggro, but this album got me into del tha funkee homosapien and i still love his jam and Mary Jane and the Teenage Fanclub song and the dude from Biohazard screaming like a loon… good times.

someday, in a far flung future with self-driving cars (i guess i've given up on FLYING CARS - thanks obama!) and the ability to print photographs on silk, that image of HAL and Samantha will make a great novelty bow tie.

—-fixes internet with a squinty glare and slowly shuts the door, then frantically turns the locks and goes into the corner to collapse in a sobbing heap, desperately petting the dog for companionship until it wiggles loose and goes into the other room to rip up the carpet—-

i'm not trying to get into some internet pissing match but, for the record, i'm 6'5 and weigh (then and now) around 200 lbs. I'm not The Rock but most people i meet are smaller than i am.