You know you’re making my point, don’t you?

Slow day at work? Ran out of blondes to touch up?

Miserable, blue-shirted wankers. They only act the way they do because they don’t get punched quite as much as they deserve.

We need to wage war on cliches. TV Tropes should exist only as a tickbox list of things to avoid, and all creative writing students should be forced to watch Garth Marenghi’s Dark Place. Just because it’s popular, that’s no reason why it should be crap.

Isn’t there a ditch you should be wallowing in, or something?

Is the man really a bird-man, or just a scary adversary conjured by a confused boy?

Irony is being more familiar with Kara Brown than most of the Z-listers in her column. I mean, I know who Bugs Bunny is, but...

This is only creepy if you’ve never gone on the pull in Shirley, Southampton.

Image One: “I thought they were getting James Remar!”

That always struck me as a ‘make it up as we go along’ grimdark ending.

And that is proof that the art of headline writing is not dead.

He’s got an English accent. However, the closest he came to being Santa was when he worked with David Sullivan’s porn-elves at that dildo factory. (Where he earned the nickname ‘Chicken Fucker’, for some strange reason.

Three things leap to mind:

Clementine would have Ellie in a fight. Just saying.

I feel sorry for BOB, but the rest can go fuck themselves with industrial machinery.

Subtle+Devastating+Dry Wit = SHADE.

That’s the thing - he’s an incompetent businessman but an amazing bullshitter. Having an electorate full of gulls and suckers didn’t hurt either.

The Trump Cabinet can be summarised like so: “Spivs and Nutters”.

Being the distant fellow he usually is, Bruce initially wants nothing to do with the dog